Nighttime Routine For Neurodivergent Adults

A sample nighttime routine for neurodivergent adults.

A while ago, I realized I had fallen into a nightly routine of watching TV until I couldn’t keep my eyes open and then going directly to bed. My mornings became filled with avoidable stress, and I knew I could have healthier habits.

To fix this, I sat down and created my nighttime routine. Rather than being focused on the aesthetic, Instagram-ready side of things, this routine focuses on my health, hygiene, and reducing my morning stress.

In this guide, I will walk through my nighttime routine. This is just an example using what has worked for me as an autistic adult. If you’re interested in building your own routine, use this guide as a starting point as you come up with ideas.

Start Your Routine: Set A Closing Time

I often have big plans for my nighttime routine. I have this vision of me going to sleep knowing everything was done and that I am ready for the morning. However, it always seems to be 2 AM before I realize I should sleep, and a whole routine isn’t usually realistic at that point. 

The solution that I’ve found for this is to set a closing time– a time when you will start your night routine. It’s a signal that the day is over and you need to prepare to go to bed. This can be especially helpful if you struggle with identifying when you are tired or if you have a hard time keeping a consistent sleep schedule. 

My ‘closing time’ is 11:30 PM. While I am sometimes in bed earlier than that, 11:30 PM is my cutoff time. This limit is especially helpful if I’m doing something I’m interested in and am tempted to keep going past the point of exhaustion. Pick a closing time that works best for you.

Because you may not always notice the time, I recommend setting an alarm for whatever time you choose. 

There may be occasions when you choose to stay up later than normal. That’s okay, and it’s a choice you are free to make. Having a set closing time allows you to consciously make that decision rather than accidentally finding yourself staying up too late. 

Once your closing time hits, it is time to start the routine.

Phase 1: Morning Preparation

The first part of my nighttime routine helps me prepare for the morning. I usually wake up hungry and tired, and life can seem more dramatic when I feel like that. This part of the routine aims to limit any stressors in the morning so that I can start my day off on the right foot. There are a few steps I include in this phase.

Step 1: Put Away The Dishes

Everyone has a small thing that stresses them out more than it should. For me, it’s the dishes. If I am overwhelmed, a sink full of dirty dishes is guaranteed to make it worse.

To help me be less stressed in the morning, I make sure to do the dishes before bed.

Dirty dishes may not bother you; use whatever affects you the most. This could be laundry on the floor, an uncharged computer, or clutter on the table. Tackle this before bed so you can wake up to a more peaceful morning.

Step 2: Pack For Tomorrow

The only thing worse than running late is running late and not being able to find your keys. Packing the night before can help set you up for success.

I have a work bag that I rarely remove anything from when I am at home, which makes part of this step easy. However, I usually pack my lunch for work, and that was difficult to do in the morning. There was never enough time, and I always got overwhelmed trying to think of what I wanted to bring. 

The solution to this was to start packing my lunch the night before, or at least decide what I was going to bring ahead of time. By having my lunch already packed and my items in my bag, I have one less thing to worry about in the morning.

If you aren’t able to pack everything beforehand, consider creating a checklist of the things you’ll need. This will stop you from worrying that you forgot something in the morning. 

Step 3: Pick Out Your Clothes

Once my bag is packed, I like to pick out my clothes for the next day. 

When I wake up, I am usually irritable from hunger and tiredness. This means I get easily caught in the “I have nothing to wear” loop and end up trying on all of my outfits. By the time I’ve settled on one, I’m running late, don’t like my clothes, and am overwhelmed. 

Once I started picking out my clothes beforehand, most of this stress disappeared. Having my clothes already prepared means I can get dressed without thinking about it. This doesn’t mean the outfit is set in stone, however; if you wake up wanting to wear something else, go for it. 

Phase 2: Personal Maintenance

Once I’m prepared for the morning, I begin winding down. This phase covers hygiene and relaxation-related parts of my nighttime routine.

Step 1: Fill Up Your Water Bottle

I’ve never been great about drinking water, and I know I will not get up to get water if I need it in the middle of the night. In order to encourage myself to drink water, I make sure to fill up my water bottle before bed each night.

This also allows me to have a mostly full water bottle in the morning, which makes it easier for me to start my morning hydrated. 

Step 2: Bathroom Activities

I count everything I do in the bathroom as one step, since it is the only time I enter the bathroom during my routine, and I do it all in one go.

This step includes:

• Using the restroom
• Brushing your teeth
• Flossing/using mouthwash
• Washing your face

Feel free to add or remove items from this list as needed. 

Step 3: Nightstand Activities 

The last part of my nighttime routine is my nightstand activities. These are things that take place at or around my nightstand, and they are the last things I do before bed.

My nightstand activities include:

• Taking medications
• Plugging in devices
• Setting alarms
• Turning off the light

Again, this list is very flexible– change it to meet your needs!

Routines With Disabilities

The routine outlined here is my ideal nighttime routine, and it is what sets me up the best for the morning. However, it still doesn’t always get done.

There are times when I cannot complete my full routine due to burnout, executive dysfunction, or some other complication. The nature of having a disability means that I am not always able to do what I would like to without causing harm to myself.

There will be nights when you, similarly, cannot get it all done. Remember that this is okay. Routines are a tool, not a requirement. You can always start again tomorrow.

If you find yourself struggling to complete the routine, don’t force yourself to do it all. Instead, figure out what the most important steps are, and focus on those. 

This list of the most important steps is your base routine, or the routine that you will try your best to never miss. For me, this includes brushing my teeth, filling my water bottle, and taking my meds. 

Creating a simplified routine gives you the flexibility to meet yourself where you are and to avoid pushing yourself too hard. There is value in doing the full routine, but it’s not worth hurting yourself to do it. 

Conclusion

Once I’ve completed this routine, I can sleep soundly knowing that I have done everything I could to make the morning go smoothly. 

You can change this routine however you’d like. I recommend looking at what causes you the most stress in the morning and what you need to do for your health, and building your routine around those items. Build the routine that sets you up for success.